Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Posted 8-16-06

Don't faint....

Don't faint - I'm really here.. I really am... frightening eh?

So, there's been tons happening around here. Let's see if I can get it all down in a nutshell. Otherwise, you'll all be crosseyed, and drowning in boredom if I were to give you a recitation of everything that's occurred in the last while.

So, Untamed had a party. Short sweet but lots of fun. Our friend Kathy Carr was the big winner and won a wonderful Christmas album kit. She participated in just about every event there was to play in and won them all! GO Kathy!

Doris had an impromptu crop and we had lots of fun visitors show up for that. She always does such a nice job of chatting it up and giving away lovely gifts to participants. She's a gem of a girl!

As for our family well... we've had illness, many doctor's visits, emergency dentist visits (can you say OUCH!!!) and a parting... My sweet Aly girl has gone home to Iowa. I'm sad but glad too. She made the right decision and is on her way to really growing up to be quite a wonderful young lady. I can't tell you how much I miss her already. When she was a block away, it was easy. I knew I could see her and I could pop in to her work, sit in her station and see her all I wanted. Now, she's 1500 miles away and I have my photos and memories to keep me company.

I think God lets people into our lives when we all need it the most. Aly needed a good influence for her that was not her mom or dad. It's not that they are bad people, they are most certainly not. They are loving and caring parents who wanted only the very best for their child. What real parent doesn't? Aly needed someone to be a stablizing and good influence on her that was objective. She came into our home frightened, out of control, young and beautiful, immature and in desperate need of feeling loved. She knew she was loved, but she needed to feel it.

She has left Virginia feeling loved, in control, maturing nicely, beautiful, and feeling so much more self assured than when she arrived. She is wonderful. And now her momma can hold her again every day and see her beautiful face and hold her hand and talk girl talk and they can do it with joy and not question. They do not have to be suspicious of each other's motives or what the other is thinking. Their relationship has grown and hopefully they can now know each other as emerging adult and adult and not have just a mother/daughter relationship.

Me, I'm empty... my daughter has gone. I know she's not my blood daughter, but I miss her that much all the same. As a parent, in my opinion... and yes I know opinions are like something else, we all have one and none of them is better than the next... but, in my opinion, being a biological parent is one thing. But really parenting means you have to be a good example, not just to your kids, but to all their friends and whomever passes your door. Just because someone else's child is not mine doesn't give me license to be a less responsible parent to that child when he or she is ibn my home, my care of my presence. Also, we are often looked to by our children's friends as a role model. Not necessarily because we are a better parent than their own, just a different parent. My kids hate that their friends think I'm the "Cool Mom". They call me mom, they talk to me when they can't talk to anyone else and they respect me and the advice I give them. Long after they have stopped being regulars at my house, they come back to see me and chat. It's a real kick to have them come to the door and the kids go, "Oh hey, how are you? Really? That's cool. Did you need something? Oh, you came to see MOM? Oh, okay... MOOOO-OOOOMMMMMM you have company! Okay, well, see ya." What a hoot it is sometimes... (And yes, I get the evil eye over it plenty.)

I can remember what it was like at 21 living with our family friends whom I had not known long or as well as my folks and they became my second parents. Mar (Aly's real momma) says I'm truly Aly's second mom. She looks to me like a mom/friend and not just someone she knew. That really touched me. I miss her greatly. And I'm incredibly proud of her. Incredibly proud...

On my own home front, Reaves is the new Assistant Manager of the restaurant. He is salaried now and has some other options available only to management. WOO HOO!! I'm really proud of him and his accomplishments. He's doing so well... And even when he gets frustrated with home or work, he's doing so well processing that frustration. I'm incredibly proud...

Taylor has had his Senior Portraits taken. He doesn't look like a child any more. He's really growing up and I'm kind of incredulous he's a Senior. He's looking at filling out his college applications, though he has his heart set on Longwood University. He's focused and in charge right now and doing so well. I'm incredibly proud...

And Dalton. *sniff sniff* Dalton is going into Kindergarten. He's registered, pre-screened, had his physical and his shots and it's done. He's ready to go to school. We've even got all the required school supplies already packed into his new backpack. He maturing too and is much more independant that ever before. I'm, well, I'm wistful..... and I'm incredibly proud.

Where did that time go? I really don't remember giving any of my children permission to be teenagers let alone making their ways in the world.... Reaves, Taylor, Dalton and Ashley And my little guy... when did I say he could be a school aged child? When did he get so "worldly"? He can call his friends on the phone now. He is perfectly content to be elsewhere playing with his pals and no longer "needs" his mom to be around. Holy cow where did the time go?!

So today I leave you with this photo of all three of my boys. They are all three playing a video game together, actually spending time together... all three of them!!!!! This has not occured in some time so of course I had to snap some photos (for which my oldest swears he will get me back someday lol)...

Just remember this. You are important. You never really know how important you really are until you're called upon to use your intelligence, wit, sense of humor and wisdom. You may not have ever realized how important you are until that very moment when someone you didn't realize you needed in your life comes into it. I am so proud of all four of my children. Reaves, Taylor, Dalton and Aly. My daughter. The one I always wanted, the one I love like a mother loves her daughter. The one who completed my family of awesome boys and now they have a sister for life.

God bless you Aly... I sure do miss you......

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