Monday, February 4, 2008


How is it you can find out on a Friday, what you've known for years now, and at the same time they say to you, "Okay, you're OUT of remission." Hmmm, um, if you're just now diagnosing me, how can I be out of remission, can't I just be "Active" at the moment? She says to me, "Well, no, because, as you said, this has been a suspicion for years now, and you've been treated for a year with RA medications because we felt RA was the correct diagnosis, so now that we have blood results that match your patterning results, we can say to you that you're "out of remission"."

Oh, I say. "Out of remission." When I think of remission, I think of cancer. I think of my mom, and I think of her healing (her journey home). I don't like this term. I've given it a lot of thought over the last couple days and I really don't like this term.

I think I'm definitely not going to refer to myself as out of remission. I think I'll refer to these times of activity to being learning exercises. I'm learning now how to control this illness. I'm learning more about it to be better prepared to help others who come into possession of this "thing" called RA. I'm learning how to cope and learning different skills to cope with it. This is a learning exercise in which I'm actively engaged at the moment.

During periods of inactivity, I'll simply be on vacation from school. Yeah, I like that a lot better. I mean, school is for learning and focusing on the subjects at hand. Vacation is for enjoying your time away from school/work. It's for celebrating life. I think this is definitely a much better scenario for me! And it's a lot more emotionally rewarding to consider it this way since I LOVE learning. So I officially declare myself in school. A time during which I am pursuing knowledge and skills by which I can better handle these periods of activity.

Back to School!!!!!

1 comment:

NikJustNik said...

Your right is a horrible term and I only associate it with that horrible C word..

Sending you all my love and prayers babe..